The House Of Mourning

In Ecclesiastes 7.2, we read a challenging and somewhat surprising verse: “It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting, for this is the end of all mankind, and the living will lay it to heart.” In other words, visiting a funeral benefits our souls more than attending a party. But why is “sorrow better than laughter,” as the next verse bluntly states? Because it causes us to remember the inevitability of death. Although this remembrance is hardly pleasant, it provides an opportunity to learn valuable spiritual lessons. Let’s briefly explore two of them.

1. Our lives will be fruitful if we do not ignore our coming deaths. This might seem like a counterintuitive point to us; surely a constant focus on the happy side of life will yield much greater results! However, since death is the door to eternal glory with God, thoughtful reflection on death’s presence in life can lead us to a joy that far surpasses anything we could experience here. Death is also the portal to eternal punishment and a sober understanding of this will lead us away from punishment toward the everlasting joy we all yearn for. Therefore, how does the presence of death affect our lives? How does it change our daily planner, yearly resolutions, and general life goals? How will it influence our willingness and desire to be a servant to others? How will it shape our priorities?

 Legitimate mourning should not be unnaturally suppressed or hurried through. Since this verse encourages periodically dwelling on death, we may draw out the principle that genuine times of grief should not be hastily put aside. Obviously God does not wish us to live in constant depression, but neither does He desire us to forgo opportunities to deepen our faith. In our American culture, we are uncomfortable with grief and sadness – either in ourselves or in others. We might experience (or project) an unspoken pressure to be always cheerful, as if every day gives us cause to be jolly. But we all know that real life does not resemble a never-ending party and treating it that way cheapens life and ignores plain reality. In life, we do experience times of loss and failure and if such experiences are disregarded or rushed, we cannot learn from them properly.

The message of Ecclesiastes 7.2 is reiterated throughout the Bible. According to one estimate, 70 of the 150 Old Testament Psalms are songs of mourning. New Testament passages also recognize the place of grief (e.g. “weep with those who weep” – Romans 12.15). There is even an entire book of the Bible devoted to processing intense grief in a godly way (Lamentations). Is God encouraging us to be like Eeyore – the despondent Winnie the Pooh character? Of course not! Rather, God desires us to face this life for what it is, so that we can increase our faith in Him and someday see His face in the life to come.   Nathan